Joe Arnstein's Impressions of Russia

Privet from Joe in St. Petersburg (that's Cankt Peterburg for us locals).

So, let me tell you a little bit about my trip so far. I was going to call you, but all we would have been able to talk about would have been little things like money, food, whether or not I have toilet paper (and of course the answer is YES for all those who haven't heard about the new consumerist movement in Russia that has been going on for the past 5 or 6 years...) anyway, as for that, I have been fed very very well by all of my hosts. That is probably a given for any tourist in Russia--Russian mothers (women in general I think) are great cooks, and feed you three courses at each meal making sure you are stuffed by the second course.

Andrei and his mom did a spectacular job not only at keeping my stomach happy, but at making my stay in Moscow eventful and informative. His mom really knows which places to take the foreigners to! Andrei knows so much about history and art, I was so impressed. He gave me one hell of a tour of the Tretyakov Gallery--a museum with the largest collection of Russian art in the world. When I say tour, I mean historical background on EVERYTHING from artist to style of art. =) I was never bored. My only problem is remembering all of the Russian names--Tsars/Saints have given me the hardest time. Moscow is a nice city, not to be compared with anything American. I have to say that about everywhere I have been. The two countries don't really compare until you get to St. Petersburg which is the most Westernized city so far.

My first impression of Russia was made by all of the kiosks everywhere. The price of owning space in a building is very high, so most people just get permits and sell their food and drinks out of metal boxes (which I would imagine get very very crowded inside, and get very hot in the summer), and each kiosk allows business to transpire through a very small window. This is the second observation I made of Russia--all business is done through very small windows which you can only reach by bending down, and don't expect to see a smiling face on the other side. You should have your money on the table and be very brief in your requests. The coolest thing here (from an alcoholic's perspective maybe) is that liquor is readily available for purchase from EVERY kiosk, and that people open a beer on the street and drink it as they walk onto the bus or tram. Vodka comes in "soda cans" or in what looks like little yogurt cups--just big enough to enjoy one during your lunch break. Also about the alcohol: It is very hard to tell if you are getting an authentic drink, or if you are buying a counterfeit--for example: everyone sells Stolichnaya (Stoli to us locals), but who knows if what is inside was made in a Stoli factory or in Ivan Ivanovich's basement? Chances are that the sticker was plucked off a real bottle, and smacked onto a different bottle with similar (or not) contents.

Now, about those buses and trams I mentioned: Everyone for the most part takes public transportation. It seems to be very efficient, though maybe their machines (buses/trams) are a bit out-dated. No big deal really, it just adds flavor to the cities. They are operated on an honor system, where you buy a strip of tickets (or a student/pensioner's pass) and punch a ticket every time you get on the bus. Whether or not you punch your ticket is up to you, but you risk getting snagged by the sporadic raids from "controllers" who patrol randomly, flashing their little passport-like ID, demanding your canceled ticket--the fine being 10,000 roubles if you can't produce one. In Moscow I bought a string of tickets but thought that I could avoid the controllers, or maybe outsmart them somehow, by punching one ticket and then showing it if I was accosted by one of these little-feared, state- commissioned enforcers. Well, Andrei told me not to worry about them because after 8:00 they are never out. But, at 10:30, just after he told me not to worry, a controller came up to me (not wearing any kind of uniform, just shabby street clothes) and demanded my ticket. I pulled out my string and showed him the one canceled ticket. To this he smiled and in Russian said something like, "Good try, now give me 10,000 roubles," to which I responded with, "Chto? Ya ne punimayu." (What? I don't understand.) He probably realized it would be harder to pry the money from my pockets than to leave me alone and bother someone who spoke the language, because he just moved on. Since then I have tried to be honest and punch my tickets, though it is not such an important ritual, particularly because one cannot usually move his arms on these VERY very crowded buses. You don't know a tight squeeze until you try fighting three babushkas who are coming up behind you to fit onto the bottom step next to the door, while the hundred people inside are trying to exhale but cannot. Most stand, and it is a common Russian practice to take up as little space as possible; it is also common practice to push and grunt on one's way to the door at a stop.

Well, anyway, this experience has been similar in each of the three cities I have been to so far, and I was questioned twice by a controller--the last one being the most rude, poorly dressed (with stickers of naked ladies on his controller ID and on his jacket), representative of the state I have encountered thus far. Still, I like this honor system--it is efficient, quick, and very convenient--there is not a place one can't go by tram or bus.

Back to Moscow. I went to one of Oksana's friend's apartment. Her name is Olga, and she is so nice. She just graduated from her university after 5 years with a master's degree and certification to teach sociology. She is really nice, and so is her family. It was as if we had been friends for years! She didn't even know Andrei and only heard about me from Oksana, but her mother cooked us dinner and we celebrated my visit at the same time as we did her graduation. Again, I was stuffed by my meal, and again I drank Georgian wine (considered to be the best) with my new friend. It was funny to see the similarities between Oksana and her friend--the way they talk: tone, words, cute jokes, and witty curiosity. I'm looking forward to seeing her again with Oksana--I'll be there in July for two weeks or so. Andrei will also keep in touch with her.

From Moscow I took a train to Voronezh. It was a nice ride down there, and I got plenty of sleep in a room with a woman who was very patient with me and my uncomfortable flippings through a phrase book for words which often did not appear at all. Irina came running into my cabin when the train stopped. She was holding some roses which she picked from her dacha--these pretty flowers smelled sooooo sweet, much more so than flowers I have smelled in the US--and her step-father grabbed my bags and brought them to his car. I wasn't expecting anyone to have a car, and I was reluctant to get into one because, as I will tell you later on, drivers in Russia are the most inconsiderate bastards I have ever seen. Rather than slow down to miss you, they will speed up to hit you--I just wanted to punch in a car window and shake some of these damn drivers...

I digress. So, we packed my bags into the car and set off for her apartment. I took a nap, her mom brought me some bread (chleb) with butter and cheese, as well as some with salty salmon, and some with jam. Of course, everywhere I go there is plenty of tea. As a person who is not much of a tea drinker, I have had to get used to this fact and can now practically guzzle it without a problem. After my nap I practiced for the first time being totally alone with non-English-speaking people. Andrei had always translated for me, though I sometimes had to throw together a few sentences for his mom...here I was alone because Ira had to take a final exam at her university. Long story...kind of boring, but nevertheless, I got by. Ira didn't do too much translating for me, but in a way that helped me more than if she were to do it all. I learned many new words in Voronezh and got a little more confident there too. There was not much to see in this town, though the two of us did go into the center to walk around. My lucky feet got time to recover after becoming totally blistered in Moscow.

Her aunt and uncle are pretty young and have a very cute daughter. The girl had chicken pox, and was being dabbed with some kind of green liquid to calm the itching--she had the cutest green freckles, which earned her the nickname from me: Lyagushka (frog). She didn't talk to me much because she knew that I didn't speak Russian, but it was cute watching her cling to Ira who treated her like she were her own child. Anyway, this family had us over for dinner and I really enjoyed it. It was a tasty meal, and it came with the promise of another--this one would be a picnic at a lake in the country, and there we would make sashlik (shish-kabob) and swim in the lake. I would also get a healthy- looking sunburn that turned into a tan (sort of). Ira's uncle is a military man, and a while ago Ira asked him if he could get me a Russian Army coat (I told her once that I would like one as a souvenir). Well, on our way to the lake he pulled it out of his trunk and handed it to me: A very handsome gray wool coat with shiny buttons which had a hammer and sickle on them, as well as black patches on the shoulders that say CA (for soviet army), and a Russian flag--white, blue and red--on the sleeve. It is really nice, and pretty sharp. I might get into trouble if I wear it here on the street, since I don't quite look like a military man. And I might get into trouble if I try to wear it in the US since I don't think I could explain quickly enough that I am not a commie.

Anyway, I was really happy that he gave it to me, and he didn't want anything at all in return; it was just a nice gift that her uncle was happy to give me. They came over on the last night I was in town for a nice dinner. Ira's mom cooked a kind of "pie" with potatoes and meat, Ira made a tasty dessert, and her aunt and uncle brought Russian champagne. =) It was really nice that they treated me so well. Her aunt and uncle brought me to the train station and asked me to come back again and visit.

Irina's mom and step-dad just had a child together, so that makes Ira a big sister! The baby is cute, and I had to learn some cute words to say to and about her. Now I speak fluent baby-talk: Agoo. Aaaaagoooooo.

One day Irina brought me to her former English class to answer questions for the students. Well, when I walked in the door there was a real classroom of students--all except for two of them were girls! I was a little embarrassed but really happy to be talking to them. They were all really sweet and asked pretty good questions. I showed them pictures and answered to what I thought about Yeltsin and elections in Russia. One intellectual kept asking about what the media in the US says about Russia, about what I think of the candidates, and what I think the direction should be for this nation. No problem, but I don't think I could do it all in front of this class. Also, they wanted to know what my impressions of Russia are. Well, as you can tell from this letter, I could not give them a straight answer--certainly not a short one! Poor them. Well, I got to do a TON of talking, and even got to sing the National Anthem and that very popular American favorite: Jingle bells, in front of a small group of those who stayed to ask more questions. I passed out M&Ms and they gave me a box of chocolates made in Voronezh. That was a really good experience for me, if not for them too.

Another day Ira and I went to hang out with some friends who were just sitting around playing guitar. They are a band sans drummer, and they sang pretty well. I was really happy that they spoke English for me, and I tried to show the same courtesy and talk, when possible, in Russian. It was a good night there too.

I will jump ahead (or should I say around) to St. Petersburg. I took a train which chugged slowly up from Voronezh at about 40 miles per hour, stopping frequently at various stations along the way. My cabin mate was a 16 year old boy who's mother was worried he would run into trouble. I assured her that I ploxo govoryu po Russkii, and that ya ne punimayu anything she was saying. Poor guy. Lucky for me he understood when I said, po Russkii, "Let's play cards...do you know the game 'durak?'" So, he and I played cards and did as little talking as possible so as not to confuse either of us. The ride went pretty quickly (a day and a couple hours later), and Lena picked me up from the station.

My first impressions of this town are that it is very Westernized. It caters to Westerners everywhere--restaurants-a-plenty, many banks, tons of stores (very expensive!!!!!), and also a lot of souvenir stores. I love the architecture here! We went to the Hermitage museum (the Tzar's old Winter Palace) for a dose of art. I expect that we will visit that place at least 3 or 4 more times though. Today we saw impressionists--Monet, Renoir, Picasso, Gougen, Matisse; and also two paintings by DiVincci, and a lot of Greek statues as well. What an enormous place this is!!! We did some walking around the city, and got tickets to one of the largest theaters here. We will see a ballet on Wednesday night (tomorrow)--I think Swan Lake, or Jezelle (?). Who knows. Lena looks great. It is soooo good to see her again. I told her that I would kick her butt in cards but so far she has beaten me every time. Her mom is very nice--very friendly. You know, their family has a lot of experience with tourists; they host people all the time and Lena gets stuck with taking them each to all the same places...poor her. =)

I haven't spent much money so far. No more than $300 including travel expenses. You know how much it cost for an American to go from Voronezh to St. Pete by train? 175,000 roubles. Do the math and it comes out to around $35! The cost for me to get from Moscow to Voronezh cost about the same, but it was more complicated. Andrei bought me a Russian ticket which supposedly costs much less, then, as All Russians do and accept as just another necessary evil, we bribed the attendant on the train with 50,000 roubles to overlook this "error." It seems quite unnecessary, and way below my standards, so I refused to do it the second time on my way to St. Pete. I don't think I got ripped off though, and I don't really mind paying these ridiculously low prices to travel.

I still have a lot of stories to tell and descriptions to give. I hope you don't mind the prosaic style that I wrote it...I am planning on writing a book or something about this trip and I wanted to get off to a good start with my thoughts. Anyway, it gives you a pretty good idea of what is happening to me over here. Stop worrying, I have not run into any robbers or killers. Just tons of food, many nice people who want to be my friend, and some VERY crowded public transit vehicles. I met at the train station on my way back from Irina's dacha this nice little boy who is 9 years old. He was listening to me speaking English, and he approached me with a little green reptile saying, "It's lizard!" to which I replied something in Russian. Again, I got a response in English, "Isn't he cute? He has no tail!" Sure enough, he understood when Irina spoke to him in Russian, and when I talked in English. Nice. He has been studying English since he was 5 years old! His mom seemed happy that her boy could practice English, and maybe she was happy that we were so friendly toward her conspicuously unusual (talented, curious, bizarre) son, and they invited us over to their home the next day. We didn't accept their invitation, but we were happy to indulge in the strawberries that she picked at her dacha. There is more to that story also, but I have to save SOMETHING for later!

When I started typing this at 12:00 midnight, the sun was just going down. Now it is 2:30 and it is twilight, and it should be getting light out any time now! Pretty nice, huh? It's throwing off my system. Saint Petersburg is truly beautiful.

If you would like to see more pictures, please go back to:

<Moscow> <Central Russia> <South-West of Russia>
<Ural> < Siberia> <Far East of Russia>
<Illustrated History> < Russia> <St.Petersburg>